I’m not much of a gamer, but this one caught my eye.  Mostly because it’s completely ridiculous. Unstable Unicorns is a strategic card game that blew through their Kickstarter goal like (insert too-soon joke about Hurricane Harvey). And I can see why.

Their illustrations are amazing and their writing is on point. They don’t need these lines, but it was the first game I’ve seen that made me interested to try.

Image result for unstable unicorns

So here are 101 lines about Unstable Unicorns:

1 Nothing say friendship like stabbing someone with a unicorn
2 Use a unicorn to destroy your friends.
3 As you stand on the mountain of dead, you will know your true friend. And it will be a unicorn.
4 Pick your unicorn. Build your village. Destroy your friends.
5 The first these unicorns saw a My Little Pony, they ate it
6 The board game where friends fight for fun (with unicorns!)
7 Warning: Killer unicorns inside
8 Fight, flight, and destruction
9 A box of unicorn fights, friendly destruction, and all kinds of ridiculous scenarios
10 For delicate flowers who with an edge
11 So cute, you won’t even be mad when they stab you in the back
12 The deadly unicorn game that’s NSFW
13 Ever want to see a baby unicorn get punched
14 Don’t let their adorableness fool you
15 Prepare yourself for the Unicorn Apocalypse
16 Twisting everything you know about unicorns into a big, evil, murdery pile of stabbiness
17 Where unicorns fight to the death
18 Breaking the boundaries of good brony taste
19 Watch your party turn from “awww” to “aaaah!”
20 They’re magically de-vicious
21 Even if you’re not a brony, this is still the best game you’ll ever play
22 The only scenario where having too many unicorns can kill you
23 Adorably deadly
24 Smashing the boundaries of bronies
25 One unicorn is cute. An army is terrifying
26 Hypothetically, these unicorns may be trying to kill you
27 When unicorns fight, it’s to the death
28 Beware of evil, evil unicorns
29 The fantasy land where Unicorns kill
30 Helping bronies work out their aggression
31 Ever been plotted against by unicorns before?
32 Cute, loveable, and beyond deadly
33 Individually, they’re cute. In packs, your competitor’s unicorns will cut you deep
34 Watch when happens when a unicorn fights a narwhal
35 That’s not a horn on their head. It’s a dagger of destruction
36 Nothing pairs better with beer than unicorn blood
37 The good time game about deadly unicorns
38 The party game for bronies with an edge
39 It’s just you, me, and your unicorn
40 Your friends may hate you, but your unicorns will love you
41 Imagine a world where Unicorns were deadly and llamas attacked
42 The most adorable way to fight ever
43 As deadly as they are adorable
44 The only game that lets your stab a unicorn in self defense
45 The unicorn tabletop game that will haunt your dreams
46 Unicorns do not mess around
47 Think unicorns are cute? Meet Stabby.
48 Who knew killing make-believe unicorn armies could be this fun
49 Kill a unicorn without the guilt
50 Where small, intimate parties become a place of inappropriate laughter
51 It’s time to decide. Are you a man? Or are you a brony?
52 Testing the limits of good taste
53 It’s OK to laugh when you kill someone’s unicorn. That’s the point.
54 Everything you know about unicorns is a lie
55 Sharpen your horns and prepare for battle
56 They fart rainbows and rain terror
57 Cute is an evolutionary tactic to lure you closer to certain death
58 The 2nd most fun thing you can do with a unicorn
59 Earn your seat on the Throne of Unicorns
60 When it comes to life or death, always choose unicorn
61 Know what you call an army of unicorns? Your worst nightmare
62 Nothing makes you as hated as owning the most unicorns
63 A few beers making the unicorn murder seem funny
64 Plot your unicorn revenge
65 You when you open the box of unicorns, your party becomes deadly
66 The evil world filled with adorable creatures
67 You’re probably going to want a few drinks when you play this…
68 This is what happens when My Little Pony meets the WWE
69 For those who dream of watching unicorns fight
70 Here’s everything you need to know to survive a unicorn attack
71 The cutest way to make your friends hate each other (but just for an hour)
72 Raise a cuddly baby unicorn. And train it to murder your friends.
73 As cuddly as your favorite teddy bear. As vicious as a honey badger.
74 When it comes to unicorn battles, it’s all fight or flight
75 The cutest killers on the planet
76 Destroying your friend’s unicorn army is even more fun than it sounds
77 What is Unicorns were really mean AF?
78 Plot against your friends. With unicorns.
79 Prettier than ponies. Deadlier than sharks.
80 This is one pack of Unicorns you don’t want to turn your back on
81 The board game for twisted individuals
82 The “you just killed my baby unicorn and now I’m going to murder your entire village” game of fun
83 Become bros with your bronies
84 The only game that lets you use unicorns for destruction
85 Careful. These guys are horny.
86 Forget everything you know about unicorns
87 Draw a card, raise your unicorn, then use it to destroy your friends
88 Did you ever think you’d test the boundaries of your friendship with unicorns?
89 The unicorn game of kill or be killed
90 It’s Candy Land meets The Candyman
91 Test your friendship with unicorn fights
92 If you’re looking for a tabletop game that’s cute, cuddly & deadly, you’ve found it.
93 The board game that makes you the evil emperor of a murderous unicorn army
94 Where Dungeons & Dragons meets My Little Pony
95 You need to ask yourself. Do you feel uni?
96 For unicorns lovers who also love violence
97 When the time comes, will you choose love over llamacorn?
98 Careful. Those rainbow farts are deadly
99 When the Unicorns attack, will you be ready?
100 The most fun you’ll have killing your friends
101 You n’ I can? No U-N-I corn


Overall: OK, I. It’s tough for me to tell since this is so far out of my wheelhouse. But a few lines made me laugh and I think they’d definitely catch some people’s eye.

Lessons: This is an area where having a niche would be a tremendous value. It would take a deep dive for me really get to know this audience.

  • If I knew a few key gamer phrases, I think I could have gone a lot further with this
  • It would have eliminated repetition too
  • Made it 73 lines before hitting the formulas
  • I had fun getting silly with this, but I’m not the right guy for the project (1UpBranding is!)

Time: 2 sessions, 50 minutes