Yep, this is a strange one. But I actually used to write some content for a custom mouthguard company. The sport kind, not the sleep kind—though they made those too. These lines focus on athletic version. They were custom molded to your teeth and you can decorate them with logos, words and colors. Super protective.

Image result for stephen curry mouthguard

For various reasons, I won’t link you to any particular site. A quick search would pull up a dozen for you. I chose to create a fake label called BITE, so you’ll see that name pop up below. Fictional label. Real product.

The lines vary between selling to the athlete wearing the guard (often high-schoolers) and the person buying them (Mom or Dad).

I think these would do pretty well in the market.

1Wrap your teeth in cool
2Smile and make ’em cry
3Even the dentist’s kid wants a Bite
4A fastball to the face hurts. It just hurts a lot less when you wear a Bite
5Anyone ever call you a smart mouth? They will now.
6Custom mouthguards for weekend warriors
7Moms: ever seen Australian Rules Football? You’re gonna want your kid wearing this.
8If you think the guard is expensive, ask your dentist how much it costs to put a tooth back in your kid’s face
9Lacrosse balls are hard. Protect your teeth.
10A punch to the mouth hurts. It hurts less when you’re wearing a Bite
11The “holy sh*t, I can talk!” mouthguard
12Customize your design to look like you French kissed a demon
13Speak clearly. Let them hear your war cry
14Show em’ your fangs
15Bling out their game face
16Your teeth look better when they’re in your mouth 
17Even if you lose, you’ll still look cool
18Hockey players don’t need to look like a jack o’lantern when they smile anymore.
19Your mouthguard doesn’t do you any good  in your bag
20The only guard that lets you talk
21Now rugby players can keep their teeth
22No game face is complete without Bite
23Better protection. Clear speech.
24The coolest thing you can put in your mouth since the cronut
25Gear for your grill
26For athletes tired of gagging on guards who want to destroy their opponents on the field
27Where your mouth comes to look awesome
28Make your teeth fierce
29Grin & bare ’em
30The mouthguard you can talk with
31Never lose your smile
32Strike fear in your opponents eyes—with your teeth
33Let your fangs make an impression
34It’s like a bulletproof jacket, for your mouth
35Sure you can get a cheaper mouthguard. Good luck with that…
36Dental work is expensive. Protect it.
37When you yell victory, they’ll hear every word loud & clear.
38Where you lose your guard and get your fangs
39If you design it, we can put it in your mouth (full customization available)
40When your grill gets rocked, will you be protected?
41Protecting mouths, one hit at a time
42Pro level protection for high school teeth
43Custom fit and fierce AF
44For parents tired of their kids hating their mouthguard
45If you can’t talk to your teammate, What’s the point of having them there?
46Because it’s only cool to have a mouth like a jack o’lantern on Halloween
47Protect yourself from the dentist
48Designed by athletes who care more about mouthguards than any normal person ever should
49The “whoa, you got vampire fangs!” mouthguard
50It hurts to lose a tooth. Luckily, you’ll never know.
51Customize your teeth
52A custom jersey for your overbite
53Custom graphics–so you can look absolutely evil
54When you smile, they’ll think you’re a demon
55After the hit, will you still have your teeth?
56For athletes who want to instill fear with a grin
57Braces aren’t cheap. Protect them.
58The only mouthguard you’ll ever want to take a selfie with
59Talk trash. Look cool.
60Make your game face more fierce 
61What color will your grill be?
62How to improve on-field communication
63Protect the investment in your child’s mouth
64The mouthguard coaches love
65Lock in your Bite and pound ’em
66Make your mouth look awesome
67If chess were an contact sport, the smart kids would all wear Bite
68Your opponents will know you as “the one with the teeth”
69Coaches love Bite because you can talk. Parents love Bite because you’re protected
70Don’t jack up your teeth. Wear a Bite.
71Click in your guard and win
72Your braces were expensive. Protect them.
73Helping you keep your teeth so you won’t look stupid for yearbook photos
74We don’t recommend getting smacked in the teeth. But in case you do, wear a Bite
75Mom, don’t let ’em ruin your baby’s pearly whites
76Instill wisdom upon your teeth. Wear Bite.
77Helping athletes protect their choppers
78Protect your fangs
79Teeth vs. elbow, elbow wins. Bite vs. elbow, Bite wins.
80Your guard won’t protect you if you’re chewing it
81Never lead with your face. But if you do, make it so your teeth will stay your mouth
82You pay a lot for you teeth. Protect them.
83Got a pretty a mouth? Protect it.
84The same guard your dentist makes, only cooler and less expensive
85Threaten em’ with a smile
86The only mouthguard that lets you speak
87It’s only a matter of time before you take a shot to the mouth. Will you be wearing your Bite when it happens?
88No matter how jacked up your teeth, we’ll make a guard that fits perfect
89Custom mouthguards for tough motherf*ckers
90You’re not game ready until your Bite is in
91Look fierce. Stay safe.
92Uniforms don’t stop at your mouth
93Built for warriors. Designed by you.
94It’s the only mouthguard you’ll ever care about
95Protect your choppers
96The most comfortable thing in your mouth that’s not your tongue
97You start with 32 teeth. Finish with 32 teeth.
98Pimped out mouthguards for athletes with style
99The only mouthguard you’ll want to wear off the field
100When you’re not afraid of losing your chiclets, you hold nothing back
101Because Dad doesn’t want to take you to the dentist again
102The mouthguard for athletes who like to talk
103Get MMA level protection
104Lock in your guard, turn on your game face
105Big hits happen. Let the other guy lose his teeth.
106A uniform for your teeth
107You can still trash talk while you wear it
108Your grill, only fiercer
109This is what all mouthguards would look like if dentists were cool
110Breaking the stereotype of toothless hockey players since 2007
111A Bite a day keeps the dentist away

Overall: Pretty good! A-

Notes: It felt good to get this out. The lines came easy since I had history with the product from both ends, and having seen the results of my copy (which did REALLY well), I’m confident these would perform in market. I’ll likely revisit some niche sports categories in the future. So heads up—especially if you’re a hockey goalie like me.

Time: Dang it! I lost track. Seemed quicker than usual though. Let’s estimate 2 30-minute sessions.

And there’s #10!  Next up, a recap of all the learnings. Subscribe below to get it sent directly to you every 10 days.

10/100