I get a lot of flyers about lawn service taped to my mailbox. They all say “Mow, edge & blow” with a clip art picture of mower on the top right. Some have a color image of a green lawn. On occasion, a smiling picture of teenager.

So when I randomly poked 4 letters on the keyboard & pulled a Michigan lawn service, I wasn’t shocked to see the same thing.

Image result for lawn care flyer

Where’s the originality, my friend?

Oh. Here it is. ↓

1 Nobody needs to know you didn’t mow it yourself
2 Banish the yard work! (And have an even better looking lawn)
3 All the benefits of having a great lawn without the labor
4 Weed free & loving it
5 Grass so soft it tickles your toes
6 Green grass makes you happy
7 You’ll never get an HOA letter again
8 The only thing you’ll need to do to your lawn, is enjoy it
9 We’re as professional with your service as we are with your grass
10 Landscaping is hard. Let us do it.
11 Working hard on your lawn so you don’t have to
12 Our goal is your perfect landscape
13 Your secret weapon for Yard of the Month
14 Let the neighbors worry about their own yard
15 Lawn of the Month will totally be yours
16 The greenest lawns you’ve ever seen
17 You work hard all day. The last thing you want to do is mow.
18 Lawns that would make your dad proud of you
19 We’ll take care of everything. Even the shrubs.
20 If you had tools as powerful as ours, you’d like mowing too
21 You work too hard to have to manage your lawn
22 Mow, edge, blow, repeat—all year round (But for us. Not for you)
23 Weekends were made for grilling. Not mowing.
24 Because the last thing you want to do after work, is mow
25 Not just greener. Softer.
26 Nobody needs to know how messy it is on the inside
27 A great lawn makes your property more valuable
28 Green lawns, straight edges, can’t lose
29 The only lawn service you’ll ever need
30 This is the lawn you’ll want your kids to play in
31 The only thing we hate more than weeds are meetings that could’ve been handled over email
32 Be the person your neighbors call “the guy with the great lawn”
33 The time you get back and the pride you’ll feel will be worth every penny
34 How much would you pay to get your weekends back?
35 We take as much pride in your yard as you do
36 Enjoy the smell of freshly mowed grass—without the usual sting of sweat in your eyes
37 Bye-bye HOA Letters
38 Manage your time. Not your lawn.
39 Baseball field quality front lawns
40 Get your weekend back.
41 Spend weekends with your family. Not mulch.
42 We put the sweat into your equity
43 Love your lawn
44 Tree huggers at work
45 We’ve heard the horror stories. That’s why we started our own business.
46 Enjoy your lawn. Don’t mow it.
47 Even if it’s messy on the inside, your house will great from the street
48 We love our customers. We hate their weeds.
49 Bug free, pet friendly, weed bullies
50 Love your lawn. Don’t resent it.
51 Enjoy your lawn. Don’t dread the maintenance.
52 The “I never thought my yard could look this good” lawn professionals
53 You can still be proud of your lawn without having to mow it
54 If it’s outside your home, we’ll maintain it
55 Look at your lawn with pride. Not dread.
56 You’re too good-looking to sweat
57 You’re going to love being barefoot
58 You’ll wonder why you waited this long to enjoy your weekends more
59 Massive curb appeal
60 Those brown spots mean it’s time to call us
61 Keep off the grass (we’ll take it from here)
62 A lawn you can be proud of, without sweating
63 We make grass happy
64 We rarely get complaints, but when we do, we fix them
65 We’ve got industrial quality tools which make mowing your yard kinda fun
66 Perfect patterns & edges that won’t trigger your OCD
67 There’s a science to great lawn care. And we’re super nerdy about it.
68 Get 2 hours of your week back—let us handle your lawn.
69 We’re not just good landscapers, we’re also nice people
70 Your neighbors are going to be jealous
71 Helping hardworking men reclaim their weekends
72 Free time = me time. Get 2 hours of yard work back each week.
73 We treat you as well as we treat your lawn
74 There’s an art to mowing your lawn. You may not care about it, but we certainly do.
75 Perfect lawns increase property value
76 Meticulous lawn care
77 We study turf care management. No, seriously.
78 Does the thought of lawn care make your shoulders slump?
79 We hate weed as much as the DEA
80 Get the greenest lawn on the street
81 Weeds hate us
82 Mowing the lawn sucks. But we also kind of love it.
83 We love your lawn as much as you do
84 We’re sorry for the low expectations set by our industry. But that’s not us.
85 You’ll enjoy your lawn more when you don’t resent it
86 No more HOA letters
87 Yard work isn’t fun. That’s why we do it for you.
88 We make your lawn perfect
89 Your neighbors will ask how you make it look so good
90 Your lawn will feel lucky to have us
91 We’re not just good at lawn care. We’re great at it.
92 Maintenance free, beautiful landscapes
93 Happy lawn, happy life
94 Helping homeowners enjoy the feeling of a well-kept lawn
95 You won’t even have to THINK about yard maintenance again
96 Giving proud homeowners one more reason to boast
97 If it’s green, we’ll cut it
98 It takes a lot of work to make your yard look great. But not for you.
99 When you think of your lawn, do you feel proud?
100 Golf course quality lawn care
101 Set the bar for your block. Let the Jones’ try to keep up with you.
102 Never mow again.
103 Truly professional lawn care
104 For hardworking folks who can’t stand allergy season
105 We make your lawn beautiful
106 Reclaim your weekends
107 Yard work is more fun when all you do is supervise

Overall: Pretty good. As a homeowner, these address the pain points I feel every weekend.

Lessons: I used 5 sites for reference and continued to pull from reviews. Apologies to the females here, but I consciously focused on men. That’s who the reviews were from and, in my experience, tend to be the decision makers for this particular service. Though, it would be interesting to make one entirely geared toward females…

…Hmm

Maybe another post.

Note about #77. That’s not a knock! I have the utmost respect for hard-workers. Several friends in college studied turf management. This line was based on recurring conversations they had with strangers. 

Time: Roughly 1:05. The first 30 flowed quickly, followed by 70+ a few hours later. This felt easier. Less time referring to formulas & more pulling from experience. Maybe because I had the Scissorhands piece under my belt. Total coincidence, by the way.

If you think you could use any of this, feel free! I’d love to hear about it in the comments.

8/100