I get a lot of flyers about lawn service taped to my mailbox. They all say “Mow, edge & blow” with a clip art picture of mower on the top right. Some have a color image of a green lawn. On occasion, a smiling picture of teenager.

So when I randomly poked 4 letters on the keyboard & pulled a Michigan lawn service, I wasn’t shocked to see the same thing.

Image result for lawn care flyer

Where’s the originality, my friend?

Oh. Here it is. ↓

1Nobody needs to know you didn’t mow it yourself
2Banish the yard work! (And have an even better looking lawn)
3All the benefits of having a great lawn without the labor
4Weed free & loving it
5Grass so soft it tickles your toes
6Green grass makes you happy
7You’ll never get an HOA letter again
8The only thing you’ll need to do to your lawn, is enjoy it
9We’re as professional with your service as we are with your grass
10Landscaping is hard. Let us do it.
11Working hard on your lawn so you don’t have to
12Our goal is your perfect landscape
13Your secret weapon for Yard of the Month
14Let the neighbors worry about their own yard
15Lawn of the Month will totally be yours
16The greenest lawns you’ve ever seen
17You work hard all day. The last thing you want to do is mow.
18Lawns that would make your dad proud of you
19We’ll take care of everything. Even the shrubs.
20If you had tools as powerful as ours, you’d like mowing too
21You work too hard to have to manage your lawn
22Mow, edge, blow, repeat—all year round (But for us. Not for you)
23Weekends were made for grilling. Not mowing.
24Because the last thing you want to do after work, is mow
25Not just greener. Softer.
26Nobody needs to know how messy it is on the inside
27A great lawn makes your property more valuable
28Green lawns, straight edges, can’t lose
29The only lawn service you’ll ever need
30This is the lawn you’ll want your kids to play in
31The only thing we hate more than weeds are meetings that could’ve been handled over email
32Be the person your neighbors call “the guy with the great lawn”
33The time you get back and the pride you’ll feel will be worth every penny
34How much would you pay to get your weekends back?
35We take as much pride in your yard as you do
36Enjoy the smell of freshly mowed grass—without the usual sting of sweat in your eyes
37Bye-bye HOA Letters
38Manage your time. Not your lawn.
39Baseball field quality front lawns
40Get your weekend back.
41Spend weekends with your family. Not mulch.
42We put the sweat into your equity
43Love your lawn
44Tree huggers at work
45We’ve heard the horror stories. That’s why we started our own business.
46Enjoy your lawn. Don’t mow it.
47Even if it’s messy on the inside, your house will great from the street
48We love our customers. We hate their weeds.
49Bug free, pet friendly, weed bullies
50Love your lawn. Don’t resent it.
51Enjoy your lawn. Don’t dread the maintenance.
52The “I never thought my yard could look this good” lawn professionals
53You can still be proud of your lawn without having to mow it
54If it’s outside your home, we’ll maintain it
55Look at your lawn with pride. Not dread.
56You’re too good-looking to sweat
57You’re going to love being barefoot
58You’ll wonder why you waited this long to enjoy your weekends more
59Massive curb appeal
60Those brown spots mean it’s time to call us
61Keep off the grass (we’ll take it from here)
62A lawn you can be proud of, without sweating
63We make grass happy
64We rarely get complaints, but when we do, we fix them
65We’ve got industrial quality tools which make mowing your yard kinda fun
66Perfect patterns & edges that won’t trigger your OCD
67There’s a science to great lawn care. And we’re super nerdy about it.
68Get 2 hours of your week back—let us handle your lawn.
69We’re not just good landscapers, we’re also nice people
70Your neighbors are going to be jealous
71Helping hardworking men reclaim their weekends
72Free time = me time. Get 2 hours of yard work back each week.
73We treat you as well as we treat your lawn
74There’s an art to mowing your lawn. You may not care about it, but we certainly do.
75Perfect lawns increase property value
76Meticulous lawn care
77We study turf care management. No, seriously.
78Does the thought of lawn care make your shoulders slump?
79We hate weed as much as the DEA
80Get the greenest lawn on the street
81Weeds hate us
82Mowing the lawn sucks. But we also kind of love it.
83We love your lawn as much as you do
84We’re sorry for the low expectations set by our industry. But that’s not us.
85You’ll enjoy your lawn more when you don’t resent it
86No more HOA letters
87Yard work isn’t fun. That’s why we do it for you.
88We make your lawn perfect
89Your neighbors will ask how you make it look so good
90Your lawn will feel lucky to have us
91We’re not just good at lawn care. We’re great at it.
92Maintenance free, beautiful landscapes
93Happy lawn, happy life
94Helping homeowners enjoy the feeling of a well-kept lawn
95You won’t even have to THINK about yard maintenance again
96Giving proud homeowners one more reason to boast
97If it’s green, we’ll cut it
98It takes a lot of work to make your yard look great. But not for you.
99When you think of your lawn, do you feel proud?
100Golf course quality lawn care
101Set the bar for your block. Let the Jones’ try to keep up with you.
102Never mow again.
103Truly professional lawn care
104For hardworking folks who can’t stand allergy season
105We make your lawn beautiful
106Reclaim your weekends
107Yard work is more fun when all you do is supervise

Overall: Pretty good. As a homeowner, these address the pain points I feel every weekend.

Lessons: I used 5 sites for reference and continued to pull from reviews. Apologies to the females here, but I consciously focused on men. That’s who the reviews were from and, in my experience, tend to be the decision makers for this particular service. Though, it would be interesting to make one entirely geared toward females…


Maybe another post.

Note about #77. That’s not a knock! I have the utmost respect for hard-workers. Several friends in college studied turf management. This line was based on recurring conversations they had with strangers. 

Time: Roughly 1:05. The first 30 flowed quickly, followed by 70+ a few hours later. This felt easier. Less time referring to formulas & more pulling from experience. Maybe because I had the Scissorhands piece under my belt. Total coincidence, by the way.

If you think you could use any of this, feel free! I’d love to hear about it in the comments.